Sexually active or celibate; each of us enjoys and sometimes struggles with our sense of our own sexuality. We all share common aspects: we are born male or female, some of us are born transgendered, we are heterosexual, homosexual, bi-sexual or asexual; whatever you are don’t forget to understand and share with each other your own special ‘Sexuality Flower’.(2)

Our ‘Sexuality Flower’ contains 6 petals: each petal holds a special aspect of who we are:

Sexual identity: Developing a sense of who we are as men and women.

Intimacy: Our ability and need to express emotional connectedness with others.

Sensuality: Being comfortable with your body, both physically and psychologically and being comfortable with other people’s bodies.

Sexual Health and Reproduction: Knowing how our bodies work, ensuring we take care of our bodies in order to have children if we choose, to keep us free from Sexually Transmitted Infections, clear and correct information on all aspect of Family Planning and knowledge of health consequences of sexual behaviour.

Spirituality: A personal search for meaning and purpose in life which expresses itself in positive action towards others and an understanding of the interconnection between people and the world we live in.

Sexualisation: To understand how we use our sexuality to flirt, have fun and to engage with others; plus knowledge of how we may use our sexuality to influence, control or manipulate others.

What are the conditions to maintain my ‘Sexuality Flower’?

Our ‘Sexuality Flower’ is individual to us and needs nurturing; its care is unique to each of us; here are some questions to help you keep your flower in bloom:

• When did you last have sex?
• Is this your first time?
• Do you know your partner?
• How many people has your partner had sex with before?
• What do you know about their sexual preferences?
• Do you feel pressured into having sex this Valentine’s weekend?
• Have you thought about contraception?
• Do you really want to have sex this Valentine’s weekend?

Remember, like all flowers this Valentine’s weekend, without the right conditions, your ‘Sexuality Flower’ will wither and disappear - don’t let this happen.

Keep blooming and keep on attracting the right honey bee for you!

Happy Valentine’s from the HSE.

For more information on sexual health log on to yoursexualhealth.ie

(2) Sexuality Flower taken from HSE South Foundation Programme in Sexual Health Promotion (2009) and is based on Advocate for Youth; Life Planning Education (2007) and Adams. J. (2004) Sexuality Flower Concept